Below are the 16 most recent journal entries recorded in The Drunken Mongoose's LiveJournal:

Monday, June 16th, 2008
2:04 pm	I just fucking ate yer LOLcats bitches. Procede to die ina fires, kthxbye. Gotta luv luksusowa in the morning. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, March 3rd, 2006
3:28 pm	fuck all of tihs SHEEEEEEIT ljay cen sukc muh ballzzzz l8z bitches (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, January 3rd, 2004
2:58 am	to anyone still listening... Hey hey beeeetches I am still aliev and very drunk this new year shit is sucking the ass alot, more mouths to feed, but I will update more soon, word (9 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 1st, 2003
9:31 pm	yous cant' keeep a drunkin monogoose dwon! (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, May 30th, 2003
4:14 pm	ninja drinkenmong0ose I kicked it'sass damit.... (10 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, May 28th, 2003
3:20 pm	secrit cobra stuff If yuo ar reeding this, thet mean my mishun was a sucksess and I hev maed it into teh Terrordrome I will post trensmishun for now....you cen see my gratest battel yet.... oh no...must go....next I will post about the ninja showdown.. (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, May 22nd, 2003
3:40 pm	He told me to taek my vitmins So I ran itno thiss shit-head from Germany ... He fukced meh up gud, ashole.... Current Mood: pissed off (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, May 19th, 2003
5:48 pm	last night was roufgh I need teh asprin dammit (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, May 17th, 2003
6:38 pm	dRinkenmongo0se si PHOONING, looky see ya fukers I nocked meh bitch up lasst night she gonna pop oen out in a few moths, oh heppy day more mouths to feed. Back to teh water hole I go.... (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, May 11th, 2003
2:36 am	Drunken Mongoose, I have a problem.... The club that I go to has stopped playing my favorite swirly goff hits of the early 90's. Don't they know that Cleopatra is the greatest label ever??? Anyways, everytime I go to pull the cobwebs out of my eyes or unscrew a lightbulb, they start playing this harsh noise music that hurts my ears & makes me want to cry in an unfresh sort of way. It's too fast to dance to, they'd never play this at a funeral!! It also makes my makeup run down my face trying to keep up with the beat. What shall I ever do Drunken Mongoose, what shall I ever do??? your darkest soul of the dancefloor, Aquasnake.... Dear Aquasnake, Ferst off yoo aer a snake I shood eat yoo, you moran. Why teh fukc arew yoo unscrewuing lightbulds and bitcing abuot nnoize,noise is suprem, yuo funeral folke can lick muh junk. Seconsley, drunking will hulp yuo git over teh mekup,thet needs too stop, it si bad. I sudgest yuo taek a bathe wit a taoster, thet wiood he;p yuo find peece, or a=t leas get yuo too stpo listning t6o Clepatra music. Man I need to find soem vanila extrevt and soem bitche...later duod (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, May 10th, 2003
9:55 pm	Check out mah new ride. I got druk and rapped my last car aroond a poll so I bought tis: http://www.joecustoms.com/customs/customs.php?mode=specitem&id=82&kind=vehicle (1 Comment |Comment on this)
4:56 pm	Ask Drunken Mongoose! Drunken Mongoose is great at giving drunken advice, So if you're in need of some advice e-mail drunken mongoose at dmongoose@outflux.org (5 Comments |Comment on this)
4:24 pm	For all of you whiny axis_of_uglies bitches Prepar for drooling- here ar soem real pics of my hot lush ass: HoT SEX0rs I em teh one on teh left fuckers the bitch on the right gives bad hed, and lady's you can see my junk ;) hungover.....owwwwwch Current Mood: drunk (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, May 9th, 2003
11:36 pm	in case you were wondering I'm about a foot tall,27 lbs of drunken fury motherfucker! (4 Comments |Comment on this)
11:15 pm	so I got realllt fuking wasted and stumbled up to some guy and started to bite his legs for stepping on my tail, the fucking basterd called motherfucking animal control gah now I cant go back to that bar Current Mood: depressed (4 Comments |Comment on this)
9:38 pm	I em teh drunken m0ngoose,ph3@r meeeeee. :) (2 Comments |Comment on this)